Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
