i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
