it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
