bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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