why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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