so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
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