Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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