Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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