You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
