She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
