I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize