whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize
