maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
