Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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