why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
