Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
