these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
