and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
