Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize