I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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