my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Randomize
