Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Randomize
