The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
My penis needs a shock collar
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize