I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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