He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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