we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Acid is not a monday night drug
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
