Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
