i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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