grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
