I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
