so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
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