I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
