best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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