Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
