Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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