We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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