I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
