North Korea, Best Korea!
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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