yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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