I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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