Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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