would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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