PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize