I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Drake has all the answers
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
