My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
