i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
