I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
The struggles of a small town man whore
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
