Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I wear drunk well.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
