hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
oh god the rape fog is back!
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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