i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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